Three of Swords

i. The Nutshell

Upright:
The Three of Swords represents unprocessed emotional pain that points to grief, betrayal, disappointment, or rejection, often from unresolved past experiences. The heart may close to protect against pain, but unhealed wounds can affect current relationships and emotions, leading to withdrawal, anger, or self-blame.

Psychologically, this reflects a core pattern of identifying with emotional injury because the pain becomes part of your identity; influencing how you give and receive love. You may unconsciously expect rejection or recreate painful dynamics to stay within familiar territory. Life path lessons mark a necessary confrontation with emotional truth calling for acknowledgement of past wounds so that healing can begin. Avoiding the pain prolongs its impact; feeling it is what transforms it.

Keywords: Heartache, emotional wounding, grief, rejection, sorrow, hurt, unprocessed past wounds
Translation: Let yourself feel what still hurts so it can start to heal.

Reversed:
The reversed Three of Swords shows either a refusal to feel pain, difficulty moving on from it, or the beginnings of recovery. You may be stuck in denial, minimising what happened, or blaming yourself. Alternately, the wound may be so familiar that you keep returning to it, reinforcing old narratives that have become a repeating pattern in your life experiences. Emotional numbness, bitterness, or shutdown often block healing and keep the heart closed.

This card can also show inherited emotional pain or grief passed down through your family lineage. You have chosen to heal these wounds, break the cycle, and help future generations. Spiritually, it’s time to face your pain with kindness, moving from avoiding it to healing it on purpose.

Keywords: Suppressed grief, emotional detachment, recurring pain, forgiveness, releasing past pain, generational trauma
Translation: Grieve and let healing begin.

ii. Illus-traits

A look at the symbolic language of the Three of Swords in the Rider-Waite-Smith deck:

Three swords piercing a heart – One main sword pierces with two beside it, suggesting a primary injury supported by others. Emotional injury points to unresolved pain influencing thoughts, reactions, and relationships, indicating a pattern of unprocessed wounds.
Grey sky and rain – Reflects emotional heaviness and grief. Indicates a period of mourning or emotional overwhelm. Suggests that painful emotions have been internalised and are affecting everyday functioning.
Floating heart – Shows disconnection from the physical or grounded self. Suggests a habit of staying in the pain mentally without integrating it into lived experience. Emotional suffering may feel abstract, ongoing, or disconnected from present life.
Absence of human figures – Suggests isolation in emotional experience. May reflect a tendency to grieve alone, shut others out, or struggle to seek support.
Sharp, upright swords – Mental fixation on past hurt. Indicates overthinking, rumination, or self-judgement. May show a pattern of staying mentally stuck in the past rather than allowing the wound to heal.

iii. Influences

Planetary Influence
The Three of Swords is influenced by Saturn and Venus. Saturn relates to emotional repression, loss, and karmic responsibility whilst Venus rules relationships, attachment, and emotional values. This combination highlights unresolved emotional pain especially where love was conditional, rejected, or tied to fear. You may have learned to suppress emotions or disconnect from pain to avoid abandonment or judgement, especially if your natal Saturn aspects your 4th or 8th house. These patterns often form in early relationships, ancestral lineage or family dynamics. The deeper lesson is to face grief by separating your emotion from internalised and inherited fear or guilt.

Natal Houses
The Seventh House shows patterns in close relationships, particularly how you seek harmony or withdraw when emotional needs are unmet. The Tenth House reveals how emotional control and fear of public failure shape behaviour. The Second House reflects emotional self-worth and how it influences attachment and loss. The Eighth House shows deeper karmic patterns tied to loss, betrayal, and emotional enmeshment. Pain here often triggers a fear of abandonment or being emotionally overpowered. The Twelfth House points to hidden grief, unconscious suffering, or emotional isolation. Pain may be buried, spiritualised, or expressed through self-sacrifice. Placements suggest a tendency to internalise emotional wounds, minimise needs, or avoid working through painful endings. Growth comes through allowing space for emotional truth without bypassing, suppressing, or over-intellectualising it. Emotional maturity requires integrating pain instead of storing or hiding it.

Astrological Signs
Libra may avoid confrontation or suppress pain to preserve connection. Capricorn may detach from emotional vulnerability to stay in control. Taurus may hold onto painful attachments out of fear of change. Each sign shows a different way of resisting emotional loss. The path forward involves facing the pain directly, acknowledging what it teaches, and letting go of strategies that block healing. Emotional perspective leads to integration and growth.

Numerology
The Three of Swords is linked to the number 3. In numerology, three holds a scattered energy and can mean separation after being together - showing a break in feelings, like sadness, betrayal, or let-down when a bond or hope ends. The number reflects the emotional impact of relational conflict and the struggle to make sense of it. Karmically, it can reveal cycles of heartbreak, often tied to early relational wounds or repeating attachment patterns. The task is to see where you’re holding onto pain and begin working through it rather than remaining identified with it.

Element
The element of Air governs thought, perception, and communication. In this card, Air is sharp and unfiltered and experienced as intrusive thoughts, mental replaying of painful events, or harsh self-talk. Emotion is felt but often processed mentally, without emotional resolution. This leads to detachment, rumination, or emotional numbness. The lesson is to move from thinking about pain to feeling and integrating it by transforming your grief into grounded self-trust that goes way over above ‘gaining clarity’ which only goes so far.

iv. A Day in the Life of the Three of Swords

Well That Escalated Quickly
You hold pain from past relationships, family, or friends that isn’t healed. You feel rejected, abandoned, or misunderstood, and no matter how you try to express it, it doesn’t seem to help so you stay busy or focus on others to avoid feelings. You might overreact to small things or shut down entirely. This shows as distance in close relationships, irritability, or repeating unhealthy patterns. You feel heavy and are sick of the repeating conflicts and choosing people who trigger you and exacerbate old hurts.

Adjusting the Knobs
You begin to notice when past hurt is shaping your present. You see how silence, withdrawal, or overthinking are methods you deploy to self-protect. You realise you're still carrying pain that was never fully acknowledged or expressed and start to journal, reflect, or talk honestly about what happened in a bid to understand, helping you to separate past pain from your present choices.

Unsubscribed from Self-Sabotage
You stop avoiding the pain of loss or rejection and no longer rely on being understood to feel stable. Instead of avoiding relationships or difficult conversations, you show up with emotional steadiness, recognising that healing doesn’t require explanation, approval, or closure from others - only the courage to face what’s unresolved and respond to it differently.

Writing the TED Talk
You understand and accept your emotional history without letting it control your present. You can speak about painful experiences without being consumed by them. In conversations, you hold emotional boundaries and communicate effectively; making decisions based on current reality and not anchored in past fear. Even when things hurt, you allow growth by allowing pain to teach you rather than define you.

v. Working with these Energies

The Three of Swords reveals emotional pain that has not been fully processed. You may avoid difficult feelings, stay silent about what hurt you, or carry unresolved grief into new situations. This keeps you stuck in the past, shapes how you relate to others, and limits psycholgiical and emotional flexibility.

Track the turning point – Think of a time when you felt hurt but didn’t say anything. What did you fear would happen if you spoke honestly? Where did you first learn to hide pain instead of express it?
Name the cost – Ask yourself what this silence or emotional control has prevented you from experiencing. Has it created distance in relationships, or a feeling of being invisible or irrelevant? Consider whether the patterns that once protected you are now causing harm.
Don’t override discomfort – When you feel emotional pressure or detachment, ask what you’re avoiding. What loss, memory, or truth are you not facing? Notice if the avoidance is creating more pain than the original wound.
Take one step forward – Choose one way to acknowledge the pain instead of suppressing it. This could be writing down what happened, speaking honestly with someone you trust for perspective, or allowing yourself to feel the emotion to accept it.

vi. Building Skills

Defusing from Painful Narratives
The Three of Swords often signals a strong inner narrative shaped by past emotional pain; stories about betrayal, rejection, or being unworthy of love. These chronicles may have started long ago in childhood, and continued to shape how you see yourself and others in the present. This practice helps you create distance from those narratives so they don’t control your actions.

The Master Storyteller
Imagine there’s a voice in your mind - your Master Storyteller. It’s been with you your whole life. It repeats painful scripts such as ‘people always leave’, ‘I'm too much’, or ‘I'll be hurt again if I trust’ - accounts that may have once helped you understand past pain but now keep you stuck in fear and avoidance.

Notice the story – When you feel emotional pain or withdrawal, pause and ask yourself what your Master Storyteller is saying in that moment. Write down the exact words you hear in your mind.
Name it – Acknowledge the thought by saying to yourself that you are noticing a particular story, such as the belief that you are not worth staying for. This helps you see the thought as something your mind is producing, not something that defines you.
Hold it lightly – Visualise the story as a radio playing in the background. You don’t need to turn it off, but you also don’t need to sing the lyrics. Like all the tracks you don’t ‘hear’ in the background until your favourite comes on, learn to tune out since your mind doesn’t have an off switch. This is acceptance and known as ‘dropping the struggle’ in ACT.
Return to the moment – Bring your attention to your body, your breath, or your surroundings. Notice the feeling of your feet on the ground. This helps bring you out of the story and back into the present.
Choose from your values – Ask yourself what you would do today if you weren’t letting the story lead. Take one action that reflects the kind of person you want to be.

Spiritual Insight
The Three of Swords invites you to face karmic patterns where old pain continues to speak louder than your current truth. You cannot stop the storyteller, but you can stop letting it make your decisions. Healing begins when you act in alignment with who you are now over and above who you were when the wound was created.

vii. Embodiment

The Three of Swords shows how mental strain can pull you out of your body. When stuck between options or caught in thoughts like that stuck record, the body’s signals often go unnoticed. Returning attention to your senses helps regulate inner tension and support grounded decisions.

Sight – Focus your eyes on a single object in your space. Study its colour, shape, shadows, and edges. Let your eyes rest there. When thoughts pull you away, return to what you see. Visual focus can slow mental spirals and anchor awareness.

Sound – Sit quietly and listen. Notice distant sounds, then ones that are closer. Don’t label them - just hear them. Let the sounds come and go without needing to follow them. Sound opens space inside the mind and can release mental tension.

Movement – Make slow, simple movements like rolling your shoulders, turning your wrists, stretching your fingers. Move with full attention. This helps locate stored tension and reconnect with parts of the body that may feel frozen or ignored.

Taste – Hold a small piece of food in your mouth - a slice of lemon, a piece of dark chocolate, or plain bread. Let the taste unfold slowly. Paying attention to flavour keeps your awareness in the present and interrupts mental overwhelm.

Natural Image – Picture a slow-moving cloud and watch how it passes through an unresistant sky. Thoughts and emotions can move the same way when the body stays grounded in the flow of the present.

viii. Your Impressions

Look at the Three of Swords in your deck or the image above. Notice your immediate thoughts without trying to change them.

Where does your attention go - the pierced heart, the swords, the sky, or the colour palette? What thoughts or memories come with that?
Scan your body. Do you feel pressure, tightness, or heaviness as you look? Where do you feel it most?
What does this card show you about how you respond to pain or loss? Do you shut down, turn away, or hold it in? Is your reaction shaped by past experience, fear of being hurt again, or the need to stay in control? What would change if you stayed present with what you feel, without attempting to suppress it?

ix. Intuitive Meaning

Use this space to reflect on what the Three of Swords means to you personally:

When pain shows up, do you allow yourself to feel it, or do you push it aside? What beliefs have shaped the way you deal with emotional hurt?
When faced with emotional loss or betrayal, do you tend to blame, withdraw, or numb out? What part of this reaction feels familiar from earlier in life?
What does it feel like to sit with emotion without trying to change it? What helps you stay present with it rather than turning away?

Applied insight with a three-card reading using the Three of Swords as your anchor:

Where in your life do you keep emotional pain hidden rather than expressed?
What stories or thoughts repeat when you feel rejected, let down, or abandoned?
What helps you move through pain without closing off your heart or shutting down connection?
What’s possible / new opportunities are there, if you face your current feelings instead of avoiding them?

Let your cards talk and note your feelings as your answers unfold, writing your own words below:

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x. Closing Reflection: Track Your Evolving Lens

Your relationship with each card will grow over time because it’s meant to shaped by your life. Consider the prompts below to revisit and reflect.

What I thought this card meant when I first pulled it: —————————————————
A recent experience that changed how I see it: —————————————————
How I feel about it now, in my body or life: —————————————————
What surprised me as this card kept showing up: —————————————————
One way this card is living in my life right now: —————————————————
If this card visited me today as a guide, what would it want me to remember? —————————————————

Revisit these after a week, a moon phase, or a meaningful moment. Let the card evolve as you do.

If you feel a quiet sense of recognition, curiosity and want to explore it, browse the sessions page for what feels right.

sessions

Minor Arcana, SwordsAlison Jeavons1 July 2025tarot, astrology, numerology, the fool, uranus, beginnings, mars, planets, zodiac, houses, natal chart, major arcana, new beginnings, working with energy, extremes, first impressions, overthinking, definition, elements, air, earth, fire, water, embodiment, smell, body, soundtrack, action, nature cue, noticing, acceptance, commitment, therapy, scripts, reflection, evolve, lens, troublemaker, wanderer, zero, nought, potential, spark, new, story, beginning, golden dawn, forward, surrender, naivete, upright, reversed, reckessness, fear, hesitation, poor judgment, foolish, risks, frozen, cliff, first, aries, aquarius, fresh start, spontaneous, leap of faith, innocence, leap, curious, impulsive, unthethered, messy, beliefs, 0, ace of cups, water flowing, raw emotions, beginning of love, connection and creatitivy, connection and creativity, intution, unconditionally connected, heart on sleeve, dam of repression, emotional opening, spiritual 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matters, three of swords, three of swords pain, unprocessed emotional pain, past life cycles, grief betrayal, rejection and abandonment, unresolved past experiences, relationship to emotion, withdrawal anger self blame, core pattern, emotional injury, pain becomes part of your identity, heartache, emotional wounding, sorrow hurt, unprocessed past wounds, refusal to feel pain, grief passed down, suppressed grief, emotional detachment recurring pain, forgiveness, releasing past pain, generational traumas, grieve and let healing begin, three swords piercing heart, floating heart, grey sky and rain, heaviness and grief, disconnection from grounded self, isolation in emotional experience, seek support, sharp upright swords, mental fixation, overthinking and rumination, self judgement, mentally stuck, saturn and venus, seventh tenth second eighth, enmeshment bypassing, preserve connection, number 3, number three, scattered energy, separation after being together, hope ends, attachment patterns, abandonment, rejection and abandonment reumination, emotional numbness, doesnt help, deploy, master storyteller, radio doom and gloom, face karmic patterns, wound was created, root of wounding